Hey man sorry I got all grabby
Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
If i could bang her from 80ft away, I would
I twisted my ankle last night doing a super high five with 3 inch heels on.
I'm not 100% on this, but I'm pretty sure I just accidently talked my way into a threesome.
The fish's death was accidental. We all said a few words at his funeral. Roomie wanted to play only the good die young as he swirled down the toilet bowl
And if it was a miscarriage you should figure out whose it was. He must be an alphamale for his offspring to sustain life this long in the amusement park that is your body
My name in their phones is "That Girl". If i can't get it to go away, I might as well live up to it.
I hope one day I make out with someone in a taco truck :(
I'm glad I inspire you to reach for the stars
Or a taco
Banged my ex-wife last night...so I belong to that club now.
i'm just really offended he didn't want to have breakup sex. like that was the only thing i was really looking forward to
It's 9:07 in the morning and I am so hungover right now I'm about to take the kids I'm babysitting to mf'ing Popeyes bc that's all I want in this world
You go to class with the flu but don't go when it rains... Get your shit together
I’ve lost count of how many disciplines of science this conversation about Harry Potter has gone through.
One lesson I've learned so far from college: You've always got time for one more shot. Always
Randomize
