Come with me and I'll find you a girl. What's your type?
Vagina
I totes stole your whore crown.
With great power comes great responsibility.
Someone said we're out of ice. You collapsed on the spot and started sobbing, saying 'but where will all the polar bears live". That drunk.
Some mysterious chinese delivery man dropped off 2 free egg rolls. Clutch
You puked in the drive thru of Taco Bell. You puked as it was being handed to me. You managed to yell out "FIRE SAUCE" in between hurls.
His words said "save me", but his penis said "I'll take my chances"
The last time I saw you, you were rolling around on the ground at the bar.....
.....well it was bound to be an interesting night since I was chasing my pulls with pulls....
Sorry about sucking tonight. Drunk truck fucking is apparently not my strong point.
I'd be careful with that one, she got 86'd from the family dollar while SOBER.
SHUN THE NONBELIEVERS. THUS SAYS THE NIPPLE LORD
We've had gay sex and pie, the holiday season has officially begun.
You seem like the type to go to a craft sale baked out of your mind. I like you.
So how do u get your coat out of the coat room when someone is fucking on it?
We had an argument over whether or not she had super strength. She settled it by dragging me to the bed room and throwing me on the bed. Then forcefully fucking me. She won the argument.
The Adderall says yes, but my body says no.
Randomize