You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
i never knew gatorade would taste just as good on the way back up
I just saw a homeless man with a cat on a leash. reminded me of you.
He took out the lube and started calling it fuck fluid
& he told me 'I don't think ur a big slut-just kind of an average slut'
HE THINKS THATS A COMPLIMENT!!!!!
Have you fucked anyone in the hospital yet because obviously this illness isnt worth it unless you do. I MISS YOUR HEALTH
Ohhhh sweet! I may be down for that. I'll be a german beer girl probably passed out on a park bench somewhere.
I'm in the freezer. Shit took away any trace of hangover outa my body.
there is a video of me on Facebook getting mad at a trash bin what the fuck was in your Pepsi
She just mixed her Emergen-C with champagne... Vegas here we come!
thanks again for a nice night (and please don't fuck my boss)
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
He stopped in the middle of us banging in order to check in for his Southwest flight.
Thanks for being my pregnancy scare Sherpa...
My neighbour just came round to ask why we posted a spatula through his door at 3am. What do I tell him??
Randomize
