After I talked about my ex for about twenty minutes, she just listened, sluts are so understanding
dunno bout you, but i grow tired of beef curtains
I tried to throw up out of my window but I forgot there was a mesh screen.
i just taught a 3 year ld how to do a jager bomb, i cant wait to have kids
Whatever you do to me, stop, I found yet another blonde hair in my asshole.
How do you have time to get laid so much in law school?
I like to set goals for myself. for example, he was my first libertarian
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
The gym has a pool
my gym membership just went from "way to get in shape" to "place to go swim when I'm high"
until he told me my vag was like a juicy apple and he loved eating it, yes, i really did think we were both sober.
You're putting the star player on the bench. You dont put Michael Jordan on the bench.
Are you referring to my vagina as Michael Jordan?
Well his dad was his wingman, so I had to fuck him. I didnt want his dad to think that he was doing a bad job and I was drunk enough to think he was doing a good job.
Score one for dad.
not even kidding I just received the single most greatest head I have ever had.. It was unreal. It was like stick my dick into a silk bag of puppy ears.
That cat I follow on Facebook beat cancer so we're drinking tonight in celebration
Why were you twerking to, "The Wheels on the Bus"?
she said that no one there was hot enough for her so she then proceeded to give the passed out person a lap dance because he was "her type."
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