If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
Ethically speaking on a scale from 1 to morally wrong, how wrong would it be to give babies ambien? Hypothetically speaking.
It's now 8:05 on a Wednesday night and I'm already going home with my bra in my purse.
I just almost said to a customer "P as in Pussy"
They need 20 oz Capri suns with liquor. Douches need to grow up with their clients
You don't know how badly I want to just hold you as a soup spoon holds a bisque
No. No. No. No one's allowed to fuck in the yurt.
It was kicking off big time until you crawled out the bar on your hands and knees. Nobody wanted to mess with that.
I'm pretty sure the Jahovah's witness only came to our door because the front says "Twerk Or Treat"
It's really life affirming to be at a wedding thinking wow I took your husbands virginity
look, my penis is an amusement park, and it's closed for maintenance. why can't you just accept that?
I am so horny that I an legitimately concerned for your safety when I see you tonight.
The coke machine at work is laughing at me. Literally. I just heard laughter from the coke machine
Drunk me says 72 hours of Mexican Viagra and room service.Sober me says we stopped being lovers for a reason after the last lost weekend.
He’s got a big dick and a big ego. This could be fun
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