yo I sort of want to fuck rachel maddow. but I'm not a lesbian. actually I reaally want to so maybe I am a lesbian. at least on weekdays at 9.
capris are just wrong
its like "what can i possible wear to make myself look short and fat? Oh I know!!"
good penises are hard to come by.... must be the economy...
Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
my ex gf has sooo many hot friends... i feel like im at a grocery store when on her fb... just shopping around.
Just saying. If you end up in canada tomorrow morning at least youll have my text to remind you how it happened
I tried to cut him off and he said "I was the president of a fraternity for 3 years, I could outdrink God."
theres so much semen in my vacuum cleaner...
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
my longitudinal study of the long term effects of sloth and alchol-intake is nearly complete.
so you are graduating this semester.
I'm just learned what a rim job is, I feel like crying
I know, I know. But we've discussed my friends and appropriate social behaviour, and I'm pretty sure topless karaoke was a no-no.
reason #1 why i should never live alone: i haven't put pants on since she left 26 hours ago. and ive made spaghetti 3 times.
Hold me and let me compliment your butt
I just watched two birds fight or fuck. It was crazy. Another bird was watching closer and I know that bird understood what was happening better than me.
Randomize
