Whiskey dick.
Yea dude! Love it. Hate it. Have it.
Everyday of my life.
where are you?
in the room with the baby pig
k im coming soon
Does this mean you'll turn into an Albanian at the next full moon?
im so hungover...we just watched The Perfect Storm and i got seasick
I think this dress is screaming I want a birthday 3some with two moderately attractive guys. I hope.
just drew up plans to mow my front lawn into the American flag for world cup. that high and patriotic.
my fake id says im a 34 yr old russian lady ... how is this working
It was like she tried to cover up all the weight she gained with a fake tan...
She just did a bodyshot off herself. I don't care that it's only seven thirty, come pick her up.
But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.
My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.
No he reached for my hand at the beach. I pretended to be a seagull.
I don't know what's worse. The fact that my biological mother is an unwitting bigamist, or the fact that my half sister is trying to seduce my girlfriend.
Hold on I'll be right there, I can't find my arm.
90% sure the total babe I have been talking to all night has a kid. Ugh, so sad right now.
Im so high
My head is bruised from having sex in the backseat of an explorer last night.
Randomize
