Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
Wait, how do girls masturbate?
I dunno we use shower heads I guess.
..how does it fit?
Just desperately used the "it's a boy" cigar I saved from my\nnephews birth to roll a blunt
eww mummy girl is here...
what the fuckk. i just want to hold her down, wax her eyebrows, and give her some morals.
how come everytime i call mom shes doing tequila shots
You should really come over right now. There's hot construction workers across the street. I'm gonna go pour beer on myself in a bikini on the sidewalk. See you in 5?
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
It's like salsa. But with balls in it. I like to call it balsa
Give him a trash can and a welcome home balloon, he will be good.
Dude at the bar last night came into the bathroom, drop kicked the stall open and start saying lines from happy Gilmore as he was shitting, "go in your home! Are you too good for your home?!"
I woke up to half of the whiskey bottle gone, and apparently I showered in my clothes. Pretty good start to SB2015 I'd say?
He may be 6' 6" but I'm 180 lbs of pure rage and determination
i survived drinking for 24 hours, an 8 ball of cocaine and a threesome. I think you can handle moving.
He saw me naked after our first date and still asked for a second.. so I think we’re doing good
You laid on the floor and pet their rug. and then demanded Voss water.
Randomize
