No awkward lesbian experiences without me
I just spent the last hour reading customer reviews on amazon.com for the book "it hurts when I poop." Send help.
shouldn't i get a discount if shes pregnant?
I can't wait until next week, when I find out what drunk me added to the Netflix queue.
How dare you send me a picture after midnight that isn't porn. You know the rules.
Just woke up bloody and clutching a rear view mirror I'm pretty sure is from my car. For those of you keeping score at home this is why I stopped drinking four loko.
Come part with me. By you sleep! No fun. Idek feelings Sorry for your life.
I just listened to "Eye of the Tiger" and did 5 shots to prep going over to see him.
His voice is like having sex with hot chocolate and then suddenly you're pregnant.
It's like you know you got fucjed up when you wake up and check fir your own pulse
5 hours of volunteer work playing with puppies and banned from the frat I hate most as 'punishment'... Besides the ER trip, I'm not seeing the bad in this situation
I honestly didn't think living in Canada would change me, until I found myself watching hockey porn
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
its like i get a dick upgrade with every new guy i screw, at this rate i'm scared to see my next one
So if i am talking to a guy and he sends me a pic and he is wearing Spiderman button down dress shirt.... Is it ok if i dont want to talk to him anymore?
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