His parents had a bottle of captain morgan on the table for me when I went for dinner. I feel accepted
Just gave some kid head in the library. Perfect way to end the semester.
i feel like i am carryihg a baby. a baby made of alcohol.
He told me I was a pleasure to arrest. That's the 2nd time I've heard that.
You kept me hostage in your driveway until you got your point across that alaska has warm weather
Just had a tranny complement my outfit. Looks like I'll have to change before we go out.
just woke up in a camero on the way to nebraska, i would appreciate it if you answered your phone.
Well he walked in last night, yelled at me for not playing any music and started dancing.
I apparently used the line "I'm a bouncer too so i would know if I were too drunk" then they asked me to leave.
Your dick is going to fall off. Be careful or you'll get callouses. A workingman's dick.
Is it too soon for me to wonder what sex with him would be like?
I'm still hammered too. I started tweeting the time at one point I'm pretty sure.
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
You didnt text me.. I'm on your street with golf clubs
Your dad was just slow dancing with the priest and holding a beer. Classic
Randomize
