i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
Let's just say there's a reason that "suede" rhymes with "laid".
Apparently, there is a horrible ghonorrea out break at our school. Woo! What a way for Loyola to welcome us back.
I got to find out the airplane alcohol limit, and somehow I made it through the flight.
Next year we will be 30 and no more shots during the week.
She bit me. She gave me a brief pity cuddle. I gave her an awkward backrub, somehow I thought it would be a good idea to include the vagina in that. It wasn't.
yea, there's something about a stripper whipping you with your own belt that makes you think
Drunk me needs to be reminded of my sexual preferences.
at least it wasnt animals
He was having Sex and you yelled 'hot and dangerous!" and he responded with "if you're one of us then roll with us!" when he went to he bathroom I saw her getting dressed, looking mortified.
Apparently that big girl from last night tried to take me upstairs when I was blacked out and all I did was grab Qs arm and whisper 'don't let her take me'
My most recent midlife crisis involved eating a doughnut in 30 seconds but taking 5 minutes to do half a shot of whiskey, then deciding I wasn't going to finish it.
I need to be more functional. That doesn't mean I'm going to drink less, I just need to wake up and shit
I don't know if we can compare high school reunions anymore. The keg stands started before 7.
My signature move is making guys wonder why they bothered in the first place
I have seen you puke and 5 mins later rock my world. So there is hotness there that average people will never see..
Randomize
