drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
he told me not be awkward when his girlfriend comes tomorrow. and then he made out with me
took shots out of a medicine cup. i can get used to college.
it will be an insanely irresponsible summer.the only things i plan on not doing are dying and getting pregnant.and even those are negotiable
Just walked out of 7 11 still in uniform when 4 girls in bikinis in a convertable screamed "we fuck firefighters!"
Career choice validated
Beer coozy in the gym. Don't judge me.
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
Well on the plus side I have started adding benefiber to my bottle of wine
So did you grab that log full of poison ivy for the fire and then apparently take a piss on Saturday night too or was that just me?
will we ever learn or are we destined for a life of poison ivy covered balls?
Does it count as working out if stops are taken every half hour to smoke a blunt?
You were naked too, so it cancels out. We're straight.
Its not often you get to say, "The security guard at my job is my new drug dealer," but as of last night, I get to say it.
I think we should have a sex position advent calendar
The cat's telling me to stop taking acid, and to start doing the lords work. I'm almost 99% sure he's talking about the dark lord.
THIS CAT'S GOING TO TURN INTO A SNAKE AND KILL ME! GET OVER HERE NOW! BRING YOUR WAND.
They should invent shampoo and conditioner for sex hair. I would buy all the travel size ones.
Randomize
