come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
i went to go through my sent box of drunk texts from last night and they were all deleted... i'm going to assume drunk me made the executive decision that sober me would be better off not knowing what they said
I wish i could be on x for the rest of my life.
i believe i can now do shots of gasoline with no chaser. its been that kind of summer.
If we get out of this alive, I'm never going to a Denny's at 3 am again.
Yelling drunk tank or bust at a cop, not a good idea
I have nothing to lose. And a bunch of dick to gain.
I'm pricing out a roll of that wax butcher paper. We fuck too messy and I can't afford to wash them every afternoon.
She was bending and I said "finally, about time". Wrong, she was tying her shoe. No blowjobs for me.
Okay we're getting vodka and coming
Okay. Joe has my machete attached to his belt
THIS IS NOT A DECISION I MADE AT ONE IN THE MORNING IM JUST GETTING AROUND TO TELLING YOU ABOUT IT NOW
I plan to get very, very drunk when I get off work.
But doesn't your shift end at like noon?
I don't think you understand.
I just googled "can they trace a vibrator back to you" so that' s how my life it going.
I’m not closing myself off the to the possibility of making a bad life choice.
You were so fucked you introduced me to a pile of Laundry
I wondered why I slept in the front room
Randomize
