I was in the bathroom and heard my brother scream "YOU FAIL!!!", and I swear to GOD, I thought my penis was yelling at me.
Hi, I just found this phone under my seat at a brewers game and seeing as you're entered in as 'fillllatio' I figured I'd ask you if you know the illiterate ass who owns this phone. Thanks :)
I hope I don't blackout because this is awesome!
Dude I gave him a bj because he was upset about the NFL draft, if that doesn't lock it down, i don't know what does
no i did not stop my best friend from eating out my sister...bros before hoes
If fate has that penis in my future.....I'm down.
had to bail. she had her cat tattooed on her
Just got a message from a guy on a dating site who says he helped me remove lime pulp from my eye in a club toilet 2 weeks ago.
Your maid of honor is passed out in a golf cart on the 18th hole.
You should try cooking mac & cheese naked sometime. It's quite relaxing.
And I was aware of my actions - that is not a penis I will say no to until I have a ring on my finger
I just ate powdered extacy out of my wallet. I think I might have for a second of my reasonable life been on your level.
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
Dude we gotta go back to your cabin. left glenn. he's calling me crying and still drunk
I really love you gals. I'm sorry again. I'm just super protective of my poutine
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