Dipping chips in queso and thinking of your beautiful face
some girl had on jean underwear. i hate america.
i was so drunk i stopped mid-blowjob to make sure he i was with my boyfriend and not some random. twice.
he paid for dinner at the eiffel tower. drinks at a bar on the champs elysees. gave me a motorcycle ride back to his house, got us heineken and then took me to park overlooking paris. where he ate me out on a park bench. still have doubts about the french?
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
Is it too early to say this year has been a blur?
Please stop hiding condoms in my house. If I want to have sex with you, I will let you know. FYI, my mom found the ones hidden behind the milk. She was not happy.
That awkward moment when your boyfriend tries to have sex with his go pro on #hdporn
I just found your ripped underwear on my chandelier. Care to explain?
I just saw your brother in some random persons yard climbing a tree. Just saying.
Probably on drugs.
Thanks for leaving me with drunk gabby
Hahahaha why what's happening?
She's sending me morse code through the wall....typical
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
Do you remember punching the light out in the bathroom? I didn't, and that was at bar 2 of 4…
I forget how to act sober
I am watching Wayne Gretzky and Alexander oveckhin play video games for charity. What is life right now.
Randomize
