He wanted to take me out and said we could "go huntin in the woods."
shes in my pool wearing only floaties on her arms ill have to raincheck watching march madness with you guys sorry
there comes a time in a mans life when you ask yourself, will i fake love for blowjobs? and the answer is always yes
I'm too tired to go all the way tonight, especially if you're going to quote Katy Perry at me during
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
Beer Popsicles are better in theory
You distracted them by dancing on the stripper pole, I ripped the flag off the wall, stuffed it in my pants and we were out.
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
ATTENTION ALL CONTESTANTS OF SLUTFEST 2012 ; not only will we be judging on how many penis you have sucked but also girth and length will be calculated. If you are found lying you will be disqualified. Remember your fellow participants will be rendering the same services to probably the same people. So choose wisely and let the games begin!
But I do cardio so I don't get winded during sex really it's not like I'm trying to lose weight
he said "I would have fucked you in the chipotle bathroom" and I can't get over how awesome that would've been
I mean...he danced with his dick still inside of me. What more could a girl ask for?
Lol it's kinda hilarious. I left missing one glass... guage. I feel like Cinderella... but less classy.
i got drunk and started dancing with the plant because you were out of town
Found out that I went to the same elementary school as the guy I'm hooking up with. Kosher or no
Randomize
