dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
Hard rock hotel, wtf why am i still out, im gonna fuk 5 chix 2nite .maybe
Also I am about to cut a ringtone from "Sex Machine" so James Brown can tell me to "get up, get on up" in the morning
I once woke up to the scream from 'get up offa that thing' and smacked my head on my desk
I was so hungover I threw up on her when she answered the door. i don't think it was a good first impression
How come the only thing we can do right in our lives is drugs?
i kept drunkenly begging people i met to be in my facebook mafia
There was a gorilla playing an accordion outside of my last final. I miss college already.
FUCK YOU CALIFORNIA. YOU DO NOTHING RIGHT. FIRST PROP 8 AND NOW THIS.
This is love.
Which part? The alcoholic cupcakes or the lesbian st paddys day party?
Post walk of shame: realized the underwear I put on when I left was another girl's underwear.... woof
Wors thing about having a cop dad: random drug testing
He should just accept that I want his dick and his friendship. Can't he understand that I don't do emotions?
I thought I was bad, the girl next to me on the bench was feeding a bush a hamburger and introduced me. Only at lollapalooza.
We always have to do something together that tests the human limits of the body. Hopefully it has at least a 75% death rate.
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she cant stop having the shits.
Randomize
