first missing my period. then crying at the clinic... but why?
we had sex 3 months ago. you missed your period 2 weeks ago. but nice try.
I would drag my balls through a mile of broken glass to eat pudding out of her anus
I didnt expect it either. But she was there and I had a boner, so i made it happen.
sometimes i wish i could find another girl that loves my dick as much as she does
i feel like she has dreams of it being like a person saying hey lets go play
It's never good when you wake up covered with burns
Received world's greatest BJ while in a planetarium. Was seeing stars while seeing stars.
I just realized I'm not towing a trailer. I thought this whole drive home I was towing a trailer. Wow too high
Hey fuck you and your taint. I'm just riding a canoe called life, back the fuck off. P.s. I need a ride
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
What did he say? I couldn't hear him over the sound of how awesome his beard is.
I cannot believe this. A potential 2016 Olympiad wants my vag. To which I respond "GO FOR THE GOLD"
you have to be that girl in the audience holding up the sign that says i fucked the shit out of you
are you putting in a lot of effort today like appearance wise
I am taking my rightful place as emperor of the undead appearance wise
That sounds worse than that time you thought out an entire story of how big bird would kill you
Could you just like have a friend who feels bad for me and secretly always wanted to have sex with me
Chili is not acceptable fuck buddy food.
Randomize
