I realized today that the only reason you made out with Travis is because he has nice teeth
i found her turbo button.....if you know what i mean.
you came downstairs saying you were now 'dressed to impress'
what was i wearing?
nothing
Did someone do a keg stand in my bathtub?
And if it was a miscarriage you should figure out whose it was. He must be an alphamale for his offspring to sustain life this long in the amusement park that is your body
I cannot take someone's straight and gay virginity in one threesome. It's just too much responsibility.
I woke up covered in his pee. And then he poked me on Facebook.
I mean it was like cry my eyes out or masturbate in my moms bathroom.
Im cutting you off tonight ONE boy at a time
You have my approval. I will dance and throw skittles at your funeral.
All i remember is you yelling at a stop sign and the rest is a blur
He had really great hair, but he told me he's been in a psych ward three times. I mean I know I'm a psych major, but that's too much.
in a meeting in my bathtub while predrinkin for tonight. technology.
Once again, your first date sounds like something of an epic. Odysseus' Quest for Fourth Base.
you know you should be lucky to find the case to my dildo....that means no more random guys at the house!
Randomize
