Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
eating toast while peeing. You think this what kanye meant by the good life?
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
He started making shapes and faces with his cock and balls.... apparently if you wrap the shaft with your balls and turn it 90 degrees to the left it looks like a hamburger
Just had a pleasant conversation with a mugger while he was taking off my shoes. Why can't I get along with people like this sober?
this is not the time for floating mt dew and shots of tequila.
I think he's in need of mouth to penis resuscitation. Which I happen to be certified
If taco bell and midol can't fix her, she's in gods hands now.
He told me that his favorite part about me is hearing my voice while we fuck. I think that was the nicest thing he has EVER said to me.
Just set up my first threesome: a rapper and a Marine. Pretty sure at least 80% of girls in America hate me right now.
he's had a change of heart. and besides, we could use a laugh.
oh, well, if you all need a good laugh, by all means endanger my life.
my extended weekend of being as irresponsible as possible started with blowing the bartender in the bar bathroom. off to a good start.
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
I took a picture of you last night while you were drunk, trying to smoke a bowl through your nose. It's now your contact id.
ok so you're 100% sure this time that he isn't your ex in disguise again?
Randomize
