i got us presents. or arrested. we shall see!
The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
She got stuck in the front door. She never told me how or why.
He was with one girl when I went to bed, wad with another when I woke up and now he just told me he was with a 3rd in-between last night and this morning. Jesus Christ.
Remind me to switch to jello when you decide to do shots off my ass. It's so much easier to clean than this pudding.
Was having a panic attack, but I'm out of xanax. Substituting with vodka shots and breathing exercises. My therapist will be proud, yes?
What drink are we having for lunch?
hey the jello shots wont freeze
How much Everclear did you put in them?
uhhh all of it
at work, .. 47 yr old boss was in a fight. 2 BLACK EYES. I may get fired. I cant stop laughing
Are sex swings allowed in dorms
I'm pretty sure I just need an IV drip of Plan B at this point...
Do you understand how hard it is to go down on a guy underwater? Didn't think so....
I found myself looking up beard accounts while masturbating, I guess that's what it's come to.
THERE IS A MAN IN THE BATHROOM IN COLONIAL GARB GET HERE
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