doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
oh there is nothing like the 1st beerbong of the school year
I took a bird feeder and filled it with alka-seltzer. Can you say fireworks?
She forced me to throw up so it would "rejuvenate" me. It worked and then we took six more shots and did a keg stand. You know what I call that? Friendship.
Rode a jet ski for the first time three days after I lost my virginity. Hell of a week for my vagina.
so yeah i told her you were going to become a doctor and the first thing she said was "i still don't want to fuck him". i tried.
I could get a dump truck for 1000. Think of the possibilities.
so now that i'm sober i just want to apologize for violating your back seat...... on a brighter note thank you for playing the little mermaid song "kiss the girl," really set the mood.
Sleeping with two different guys who share a driveway is getting increasingly challenging to keep secret
I've just never had a dinner guest strut in, go directly to my bathroom, vomit.. then come out demanding whiskey and food.
I am going to wait until he wakes up to set his couch on fire and then pee it out. That way he knows it was not an accident.
We found you in the middle of the road chucking gravel because "the house was too far away".
He compared my ass to "a 13 year old track star's ass." Umm WTF? Is that supposed to be a compliment? And when I questioned boy or girl he said "either."
woke up to two girls crawling on top of me forcefeeding me bacon. Best. Hangover. Ever.
well that was a fail
maybe for you, but i got a free ice cube in my bra
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