Leaving terminator. dude in front of us leaving was wearing a baggy micael vick jersey, cargo shorts and brown crocs. God I hate people.
I just sneezed alcohol in a candle and started a fire.
i don't understand how she was down there for so long, she's like a mermaid, a blowjob giving mermaid.
He completely dissapeared at the baseball game. We found him passed out at the hotel three hours later with souviner photos of himself at the top of the Sears Tower.
So I managed to get the bitch who has been copying off me all semester in History to copy the names of Pokemon towns off my test.
If his smile makes you freak out and drop things imagine what his penis could do
The last thing I remember is crying and shaking my head as she was putting salt on my hand. I guess I took the shot
Is this the guy that did shots off my ass at the beach? Haha
yeah, you could tell they werent used to the strange things that i say. they were all outright shocked when i told one guy i hoped someone kidnapped him and stretched his dickhole over a fire hydrant
You guys are like the reason that ketamine is a controlled substance.
Strip Simon Says: DO IT
I wanna print it out and hang it on the fridge like parents do with good report cards.
oh the joys of a picture of a negative pregnancy test
You know when you're a kid and you play at the pool until you passed out? It was like that except instead of playing it was sex.
Talk all the shit you want but I slept in a oversized monster truck tire last night.
Our son just found our secret Sex Dungeon that is no longer hidden in our basement. He brought his Xbox and the TV down there he is currently sitting in the sex swing playing video games. What do I do?
Randomize
