One girl and one boy is just not enough.
dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
The second he texted me with "*dry humps you!*" I knew any relationship we might have had was over.
everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
just mention it in a side comment sometime today... like oh by the way i have a daughter but um yeah my day was good
no where in the syllabus does it say "no alcoholic beverages allowed".
I don't think a check that has "thx for the drugs" on the note is really gonna fly.
He asked me to grab his balls and yell "thats a spicy meat-a-ball" Last time I do requests.
Apparently, I woke him up at 4AM, and yelled "you're mad because we don't have sex," while grabbing his dick. Then immediately fell back asleep, dick in hand.
My bullwhip has saved my life tonight and gotten me laid. I'm gonna be Indiana Jones every Halloween!
Dammit labor day drinking cancelled due to 3 inch long table saw cut to palm
I think my body is literally trying to get me to reproduce. "fuck someone! Anyone!" - my body
he was wearing pj pants, thank you for not letting me go home with him
Hammered...8am...why is there chickens in the living room?
Lighting a fucking bong with a candle. Straight up dedication.
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