Judging that there's a photo of me getting head while sitting on a graveyard tombstone.....not good.
She climbed through the window and into my bed. Not even sure who she is. Was thinking she might be a friend of yours?
Repeat the weekend mantra. "I like boys with teeth, I need boys with teeth, I deserve boys with teeth, I will have boys with teeth".
She fucked me for a ride to the airport. If this is what the rest of college is like, I'm never graduating.
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
So, sleeping with all of my Vicodin in my bra because I knew she'd be searching my room for drugs tonight. I'LL SHOW HER.
Like her Facebook page isn't even hers. It belongs to her tits. It's Titsbook
He was in the middle of making out with two girls at once, but then the guy next to me said "I feel like I'm watching Animal Planet" he stopped to give him a high five
I texted him 3 days ago he said he was pre gaming for the Super Bowl today he just text" gtomajg kaka hee 48!!!"
And then he serenaded me with "Pimps don't cry" from 'The Other Guys'. If that's not love I'm not sure what is
Also, beer. Big fan.
For someone I see at the bar by herself all the time... I should have know she had a tazer.
Bad news man, we're gonna have to reschedule Golden Coral: The Musical
I don't know who the fuck this is, but right on man
we tried to make a drinking game out of 4 pokemon cards you found in a drawer.
honestly, fuck you guys. i'm gonna get drunk by myself
Randomize
