We argued about the championship during sex. Absolutely the manliest moment of my life.
I told him he was my first gentile. He was so flattered.
he somehow instantly knew i was from vermont.
it probably had something to do with chasing your soco with maply syrup.
You need an intervention. You fell into traffic walking home.
Not really. Birthday weekend. Totally jusifiable. Besides I didn't get hit. No harm no foul.
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
He led me to his room and handed me the remote, he left to go take a shower and there is a group of guys across the hall just staring at me... Its like they know something i dont. Help me.
My mom comes home from her weekend with her lesbian co-workers and asks "You wanna know how I got these bruises?" I've never been more torn about anything EVER.
I slipped in the shower today and broke my lighter..
Idk woke up on the suite in someone else's clothing and actually broke my ankle
If he refers to me as slump buster one more fucking time.
Haha I'M GOING TO MISS HIS PENIS SO MUCH. But not his bipolarness.
3.5 bazillion penises. So not that hard to find a new good one
Well, why would you bring gelado into a strip club?
I drank beer out of a Frisbee and it was all downhill from there...
well I ran around the park drunk with a plastic baby and fell, all while screaming "I WILL PROTECT YOU CARLOS", yeah there's video
Just woke up next to a hungry lesbian and a half eaten croissant on my stomach. Can you come get me?
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