Shes cool when Im fuckin smashed.....Sober.....She suuuuuuuuuuucks
Dude WTF? His teammate just started talkin to me on fb! Am I walking around with a "I like to f**k gators" on my forehead?
No, it just says ur easy
My eyes are so dilated i literally have night vision right now.
Just found my girlfriend's stash of animated Japanese porn
And to think, I actually considered breaking up with her
watching law and order svu marathons. all of the sex crimes cases start like my sat night.
due to concerns over safety, the theme of the 'naked fondue party' has now been changed to the 'naked fondue party with optional apron' please b.y.o.apron. extra prizes for most creative apron.
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
He just told me the blow job I gave him was like a journey
He sent me a picture of his dick earlier so now we can all laugh at him tomorrow
he forgot we were at my place and not his so he tried kicking me out of my own apartment by saying "so, you can go whenever you want...."
He showed me his night stand drawer...it has one too many sex things in it.
Exactly how many...is TOO many?
It's def pee. WHY DO I PEE ON THINGS WHEN I DRINK TEQUILA
He is obviously into the really short sex we have.
Just confirming I will be washing my asshole at your house at approximately 2:45 tomorrow afternoon.
The strangest confirmation message ever sent.
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
Randomize
