There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
I don't know what's more pathetic, the fact that you dated him or the fact that it took a Taylor Swift song for you to break up with him.
I just took a dump by candlelight. I feel like a pilgrim.
i cant remember past the part when we filled his tub with skittles.
Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
If our dicks could shake hands in congratulations they would
Apparently last night drunk me put my phone in a cup of beer to make it "fun scented".
He found my weave.. Think he'll still fuck me Friday? And how do I ask for it back?
Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
Duuuude - Drag Queen Bingo wasn't supposed to end like thissss
You never cared about felonies while buying me alcohol from the little Asian woman across the street
I need to stop waking up with no pants on.
what happened this time
I dont know everyone was gone and there was a bird in the room
If I get really high and watch Beauty and The Beast on our Netflx account, will you judge me?
Only if you start before I get home!
I will fuck anyone who brings me mcdonalds right now
I've realized that my life is a cycle of high that is only broken by sobering up at work, which only happens because I can't smoke more
Randomize
