I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
I have a voicemail from Mike at 1am. He starts to say something, but then throws up instead.
I wouldn't necessarily say I'm in her pants...I'd say I'm more on the on ramp to the freeway to the long way to her pants. There really isn't a short cut.
there is laundry and salad ALL OVER my car, i need context
You have no idea how pumped I am. I literally plan on dying. You're in my will
i feel like i am made of mashed potatoes. i love cannabis pills so. fucking. much.
Watching Supernatural does more for me sexually than the physical encounters with 90% of the men in my life.
I just want to drink bourbon and have sex and then eat like, a Christmas cookie.
I'm just going to take a nap and hope I wake up more attractive.
sorry for showing your butt to the bar
sorry for licking your cheek
It is getting ridiculous, the elaborateness of the schemes I have to concoct so my suitemates don't know I'm pooping.
Our baby is creepy.
That's how we know it's ours. haha
We've been here for 9 days, so of course I am high at my in-laws' house.
But really, what kind of hoe life adventure in Mexico would you do that would top me blowing a trucker?
Randomize
