..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
My poor mother should have just stuffed me back up her vagina when she had the chance.
Whats the count minus fat chicks?
martini and pecan pie.. breakfast of champions.
That's like lying to my vagina. I can't betray it like that.
We played "race the Jimmy John's driver". Order, then see if we can finish sex before the food arrives.
I don't understand how she could dump me AFTER we had shower sex. I'm fucking great at shower sex
I concluded last night that you have no tear ducts, heart, or sense of any feeling.
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
I feel like I just want to take a shot of jack, have sex, and shoot myself in the face. In that order exactly.
I will kick you in all of your body parts. All at once.
My RA just sigh me high as fuck acting like a zombie and scratching at my door. Thoughts?
I wanna die. I can't recall the last time I was happy that doesn't involve your hand touching my butt.
So I wore my ankle step-counter exercise thingy while I rode him. Don't fuck him- I only burned .2 pounds.
How was it?
Incredible. Everyone in the world should be having the kind of sex I've been having.
He should write a pamphlet or something...
Randomize
