I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
this is like black Friday for my dealer. I'm literally standing in line.
I realized i make the same noise when i get a blow job as when i eat pizza
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
I was still in a towel. We hadn't even started drinking yet and the champagne bottle dropped and exploded literally up into my vagina.
I have an excuse to be a whore in Mexico. I'm conducting an experiment to see if small dicks are caused by the poor drinking water.
Last thing I remember is Dusty riding the bikes we "borrowed" from the hotel through the CVS while the rest of us picked up the girls who were laughing at him
the only thing you and i have in common is the we like weed and looking at my naked body.
You were holding up a boot and yelling boot gang
We watched the first ever season of SNL and fucked for so long. He accidentally punched me in the face, but I mean, John Belushi was the background noise of our sex. I can deal with it.
On a separate note, I just found out some condoms aren't vegan. Problem.
Hahahaha I can't wait for you to ask "wait. are there any animal by products in that?"
I'm sure as hell not getting hoodwinked into going back to rehab again
How did you get so drunk?
Alcohol.
Don’t get me wrong—I love silver and bracelets—but handcuffs are not a good look on me…
Randomize
