Screwed.edu
question. what would be the least awkward way to ask your one night stand if he came inside of you because you would really prefer not to have his illegitimate lovechild. hypothetically.
whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
fyi, she knows we call her the sperm bank. watch your back.
I always figured rock bottom would've involved more hookers
It was just a friend comforting a friend. Except his penis was inside of me.
I'm on my "fiiiiirrrst" glass of wine- the quotes mean it's the last of the bottle- so I really need you to pick up your phone so we can talk about this
And my cat won't make me food. She's a bitch
There was a pumpkin carving contest and we carved a very realistic dick about to penetrate a vagina. Our Christian Youth hosts were not happy.
FINALLY GOT MY TENTH DICK. PARTY FOREVER
We watched playoff games and fucked so we could both see the TV. I've now found true love.
tbh i just wanted to fuck a guy with forearm tattoos but then he was so FORWARD about it
Sitting in a waiting room with 15 children has me contemplating if I ever want to have sex again...
You've got the chocolate, drugs and my pants. You hold all the cards...
I’m not dating him for his personality. I’m dating him so I can steal his dog.
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