we're blogging at a bar
I drank too much. My snot smells like vodka when I blow my nose.
Have you not heard of Jennifer's supreme lust for William Shatner? She wants to eat Taco Bell off of his love handles
No, that was the night I was sneezing out barf
Tried to eat a sandwich this morning. Couldn't. My jaw is locked up. These marathon blow jobs are killing me
It was a sobriety test blowjob. If he could get it up, he could get me home.
I love your family. Oh. And on a completely unrelated note, I know where we can steal a dog.
We now know how the night ended in arrest according to the flip camera I did 10 handle pulls and beer bonged a 40. My life choices are getting worse and worse this is your fault.
She had caution tape on her head and she blew me.
I'm about to fuck a girl in an old school Tony Kukoc Bulls jersey. About to earn my third championship ring in sex
I hate that I will forever be known as the girl who puked on the front lawn. That only happened once.
I have hit the ultimate fuck buddy status. We pulled over in a construction zone to have a quickie.
There's a point in life when you've got to take dick like a big girl.
dude im trying to eat his ass so can you stop for 10 minutes
Hot or not, she’s from Boston. It’s hard to nut when she sounds like Mark Wahlberg
Randomize
