The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
Saw some pubes in our toilet, hope the new look works out tonight.
I just realized I had sex more when i looked like a fat elton john. Fuck my life.
Did I tell you that you looked cute last night? I looked at the pictures. I lied.
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
This should be a warning to men everywhere: do not send pictures of your erect penis to women you hardly know - they will add cats and send them to all of their friends.
If it makes you feel any better about life I'm wearing yoga pants with granny panties and toms with socks cause fuck my life
I woke up in my tom cruise outfit with my house key tied to my thong....
The bachelor party was supposed to stay local but I think were in mexico.
In Texas. Drank way too much wine. Puked in a gallon zip lock bag. Passed out at 445 with the ENTIRE family here. Got up at 745 in time for dinner. I made you proud!!!
I like to be the stable force in your otherwise chaotic existence.
No we didn't fuck. He picked me up I asked where we were going and he said "I don't know if you've ever heard of a little place called Denny's?" He was completely serious. I told him to stop the car and I got out and called Jack.
Officially hit an ultimate low today. I was so hung-over I threw up on the ground in front of the jousting display in the London tower. But on a positive note, Brits are very understanding when you vomit on their history.
You made me promise I wouldnt let you play "fuck fuck goose" with a 40 year old ever again.
The guy i took home was a circus freak. He jerked off 3 times in front me after we had sex. And he came every time.
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