oh. my. god. the guy i hooked up with last night is currently wearing a dress.
Have you ever noticed that nowhere is the same thing as now here, i get my best ideas when i smoke
The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
he just found out the funeral is this morning so i'm wearing last night's clothes and look like a total slut.
he also begged me to fake an orgasm when he couldn't get me to come.
he turned down sex AND sandwiches. who the hell does that?!
You're not required to sleep with every guy that spends $10 on you.
I had to watch them play Salty Cracker. I have never seen a grown man cry with a boner before
Come over. I've made 2 dinners and so many cocktails. I'm a 50's housewife with no family.
Haha, maybe if he wasn't dressed up like Kimmy Gibler he could give her the D
Dad danced with a girl half his age and her boyfriend just sat at the bar and waited for dad to be done. I bought pity nachos.
Just realized I'm still chewing the same gum post blow job. This Stride shit really has everlasting flavor. They should totally have an ad campaign based on blow jobs.
How does one acquire holy water?
oh what is to come when my single life starts with a threesome?
Do you think it's my receding hair line that makes all the milfs attracted to me??
Randomize
