I was taking a piss and started puking. I pissed myself and made a mess in the bathroom. Passed out, then got up and went back out from 11pm to 5am.
I changed 4 diapers and slept horribly in our hot apt. Now, I'm at my inlaws house watching the Rangers get pummeled. Oh how our lives differ.
You want to go to a white party at LAX
Clubs are lame especially themed ones. Im not in a fucking episode of laguna beach
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
I was just sitting on the ground alone in fetal position shivering and chewing on my hand when she found me. ecstasy was not my best idea.
All you need to know is that isn't jizz
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
She seriously left me for a guy that likes his own statuses on facebook.....
id like to think im the only pot dealing prostitute that is also an ordained minister. but maybe not. what a time to be alive
After last night I am convinced that you are the human embodiment of alcoholism and bad decisions.
I woke up at 2 AM to find them in my living room with a radio flyer wagon full of milk glass plates and a Holstein cow. How am I going to explain this to my landlord!?!
Well we found Mark's missing underwear. They're pinned up on Mike's trophy wall.
is it fun? or sober?
I'm classy like audry Hepburn. Chugging wine out of the bottle on the way to the club. Shed do that. I know she would.
At some point you said you just wanted to get laid, so we had a moment of silence for your dead sex life...
Randomize
