Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
it wouldnt have been so bad but she still had the cowboy hat on when my mom walked in
if I was a wizard from waverly place we wouldn't b having these problems
his electricity got shut off. i felt like a pilgrim searching for his dick.
Just assessed the damage in the bath. Two love bites. One bruise on the inner thigh. Strange awareness of what i'm assuming is my cervix. I've definitely missed you. x
I really wanna punch him. Right in his cell-phone-sized penis
you cried when she wouldn't let you have her bathroom rug.
I think i smell like relationship. That's my problem.
I thought you just gave him blowjobs and he criticized your drug use.
I was out with the drag queens until 7am. This is the hangover I needed to kick my ass back to sobriety. Dear Virgin Mary, fuck my life.
Getting stoned at work has never been a good idea, but im always more than willing to give it another chance
You mowed a straight line through three yards because you were, and I fucking quote, "In the zone." I think they know.
I'm not finished with being a sloppy white girl alcoholic. I didn't postpone having a husband and kids for sober weekends.
A girl just invited me over for a blowjob and beer. Is this a trap?
Where'd you go?
Laundry, im. A responsible drunk
Randomize
