North Korea, Best Korea!
so looking at the guys i've dated i feel my vag is a halfway house
Now you know why i just sit on the toilet and scream
you are the sluttiest virgin ive ever met
thanks it was an honor just to be nominated
Sign #1 that I'm not ready to be a mother: I'm shopping for "maternity fishnets".
Well, I can't relate. I have no idea what it feels like to withhold sex. Or have self-control in general.
24 hours later and my vagina is still tingling. That good.
apparently there was a flour fight and couch sex...
No big deal, we were just two friends having sex. It's perfectly normal we don't remember. Water under the sex bridge,
Watching crazy stupid love and drinking alone isn't what I thought it was gonna be
Its TONS better. Expect a drunk dial at 11:54
I will not fill you in on the details until we get back, so do not ask. I got peed on by the girl I was hooking up with last night.
Just paid off my possession ticket on 4/20. Helloooo awesome.
It's all part of my master plan: have him buy me all I can eat pizza and all I can drink beer AND THEN tell him there was no spark and we're better off as friends.
I woke up this morning fully clothed with a dart in my pocket
He kept spinning my wedding ring like thanks buddy I remember
Randomize
