you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
I never said you were fat, just too fat for ME
Is it bad that on the course evaluation it said "do you normally try harder than other students in class" and i circled "absolutely false"?
she had that "i just got used" look on her face when i kicked her out at 5am
THE BIG GAY MAD HATTER IS HERE AND HE HAS DRUGS IN HIS PANTS FOR YOU. COME DOWNSTAIRS BITCHEZZZZ
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
A conundrum I think only you would understand: how to classily post "I need a ride to the liquor store" on one's Facebook wall?
I'm almost positive that you shat in a birdhouse
Got it in all night, now at a bar at 730 am and we are the only two people here. Somewhere my mid twenties father is applauding me.
May or may not have just put tequila in my special "kids+" orange juice fortified with vitamins a, b, c, d, e, and now t.
You should never be more than a quarter of a mile from a working toilet
Preach!
I just had a sex dream about orange juice, so there's that.
You know you had a good night when your wearing you best friends pants to work the next day
Hey every now and then can you tell me you want to fuck me to boost my confidence? Thanks.
I need an outfit that says "thanks for hiring me" but also says "i want dick in my mouth".
Randomize