why do our vaginas work when we are blacked out?? it's just not fair.
My mom asked me if I was being satisfied, sexually. And then discussed positioning.
what date should I let him know how fucked up I am?
Going to get a "plan B"urrito
I broke up with him in the bar & then asked him if he wanted to have a contest to see who gets the most numbers. I say I took that break up well
Lets get real here, ive seen your moms breasts multiple times
honestly i just want a cigarette and someone to go down on me... are you interested in helping with either of those
I met a bunch of Germans and said in german "this is for the fatherland" and poured a beer on my head
Found another bruise from Saturday #stopliquor2014
You're acting like you didn't chug fireball, like duh you have bruises you drunk betch
I'm pants less watching buffy the vampire slayer drinking rum. I'm not that hard to impress
I DID NOT GO INTO HOURS OF STRENUOUS LABOR FOR YOU TO LOOK LIKE A DOMINATRIX BARMAID ON A WEEKDAY. AT LEAST SAVE IT FOR THE WEEKEND GDI.
This is my second month of college and all I've learned is how to get a guy to go down on me without asking out loud and not to chase everclear with Smirnoff ice.
Essential life skills
I need to learn how to not be a fucking liability
I'm definitely not mad. My best friend is dating my drug dealer, it's impossible to be mad.
Masturbated while waiting for my face mask to dry, so it was a productive night.
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