every time you want to hook up with a guy who has a girl friend, i'll just give you a freshman
Just sneezed out a half gram of coke into a tissue. Four hours after the fact. The bender continues.
There's always the 'not have sex with the drunk girl I just met at some party' option.
That was the plan but Tequila showed up at the party too.
When you awake you'll realize that your car is missing....just know that I had it and becuz of your car I hooked up with the hot bar tender that looks like that guy from bay-watch however I parked it in a loading zone and it was towed...that sex was TOTALLY worth it love you
Biggest penis I've ever pity fucked
I thought the cops would know I was on shrooms because I was 10ft tall.
I ate all his french fries. He was no longer useful to me.
I'm really glad that we can be casual hook up buddies. This is a true friendship. Now, please convince your roommate to do the same. Thanks.
WHY WERE YOU COOKING NAKED?
WHY WERE YOU SLEEPING ON MY COUCH?
Oh my god and he smells like heaven wrapped in a beard of knowledge
5 hours of volunteer work playing with puppies and banned from the frat I hate most as 'punishment'... Besides the ER trip, I'm not seeing the bad in this situation
I am so sorry. Not sure for what, but whatever I did last night probably merits an apology, so I'm covering my bases.
Well I just took a pregnancy test... So how's your thanksgiving?
He was licking my ear while recommending that I shop at IKEA. I think he's my perfect guy.
How bad is it that I can say that this isn't the first time a married man, who is in the military, has tried to make me his mistress?
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