So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
Is it necrophilia if we're both dead?
Wow, this guy is harder to get rid of than gum in pubic hair
I just want you to know that were having pizza delivered to the emergency room
There is no way I'm taking advice from somone who's idea of a balanced diet consists of vodka and lemon detox juice
12 trash cans filled with water. Beer cans floating in each, 12 ft apart. Dodgeball. Ultimate beer pong.
Rules. We have to wear superhero outfits
he went to find a bathroom and came back 10 minutes later with a fifth of bacardi, a pack of cigarettes, and two funnel cakes. he is a man among boys.
I am more familiar with your toilet than I ever want to be with any appliance
Concert was great. Tackled the lead singer. Met him afterwards. He was cool about it.
High as shit. I just described caramel syrup on crackers to my mom for 15 minutes...
So I'm thinking that so long as I have this piercing, I'm going to get tested for explosives at the airport
How do you leave a condom wrapper under my mom's pillow...
This may not be the best moment to laugh, but I am.
In other news, I just sent her a video of me masturbating while driving in the rain, so I guess you could say I've mastered Snapchat
That's too much drama for once a month dick... that's in-house dick drama only
My mum just told me to stop being so pathetic and just find someone to have sex with, even if I don't like them, just be grateful for the sex. Wow.
Randomize
