super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
My itunes is telling me i listened to toxic by b spears 108 times last night
Apparently I'm the guy that didn't get the memo that Afliction and wifebeaters were the proper attire for tonight... so I'll just sit here alone in my sweatervest and be judged.
just walked past a girl in her cap and gown puking her brains out beside a tree. her friends were taking pictures of her.
You should probably wake up already as I have yet another story for you. Teaser? Blood from knife wound. Tequila. Guitar hero. Kitchen counter. Lawyer.
you just stood there spinning and got mad if anyone tried to stop you
Now if u will excuse me I have to go prep my vagina for this amazing sex filled weekend I'm about to encounter
dude, you were feeling up her boob for 20 minutes in front of the guy she was hitting on because you and her had an argument over who had bigger boobs.
hey man, it was for science okay.
We had an in depth conversion about the best way to take a dick pic. Both with and without mirrors.
Like I just asked Greg why I don't have a crown for my vagina. That drunk.
Well sort of got busted by a cop while having sex outside, so your call
I caught a glimpse of his penis. I can only imagine what your mom's vagina goes through because of that penis
He somehow always manages to get me naked within 5 minutes of being together. It's like fucking witchcraft.
I just want cinnabon and vodka.
Dude someone puked in a bowl n put it in the fridge. I thought it was salsa! Who does that?
Randomize
