i mean you're really good at taking the morning after pill...so you could put that on your resume..
yeah, i think fast in a bad sitatuion and am able to react with appropriate measures
At any point in time, have you stopped and thought "I wonder how high Willie Nelson is right now?
The more I hate his personality, the more I love his penis.
I have shoes on. No pants. And my jacket pockets are full of ketchup and grass. Yes. Good night.
is facebook stalking your hot therapist socially acceptable?
and i'm pretty sure he drank the lava lamp
just walked past the recycling bin in class, there's keystone cans in it. go cougs.
The floor and the wall just switched. I'm falling.
Well, remember that night we took shrooms at graces an had to leave immediately to go home and hold each other on the futon and sob for four hours? That bad...
I just found a grey hair. On my nipple. Fuck you too, Mother Nature.
For new year's, we should just keep our resolution simple and keep accomplishing burpees in heels.... while drunk.
I walked out and he was covered in jelly, slithering around the floor. I don't know how to process that.
I pack a first-aid kit when I DD for you. What does that tell you about your partying? For what I see and do, paying my food and gas for the night is a goddamn BARGAIN.
The reason why I poison my organs is so that you guys can't sell them.
Sorry. Im too sleepy to penis.
Randomize
