meow
WTF. STOP SENDING ME ANIMAL NOISES. ITS FUCKING WEIRD.
he was drinking cheap vodka with warm tap water and a packet of crystal light. if that's not an alcoholic then idk what is
we did it on the golf course and he threw the condom in the pond. some poor fish is gonna choke on it
You're the only person I know who would say "we'll play it by ear" referring to a threesome
ATTENTION ALL CONTESTANTS OF SLUTFEST 2012 ; not only will we be judging on how many penis you have sucked but also girth and length will be calculated. If you are found lying you will be disqualified. Remember your fellow participants will be rendering the same services to probably the same people. So choose wisely and let the games begin!
Found the puke drawer
We are there now. They have a giant cock and balls with an eagles face and wings.
The reign of the rally queen is over. Welcome to the age of the walking dead.
I remember saying your puke looked like a jellyfish and you got very offended.
Dumb decision of the night...walking home drunk and smelling my pepper spray
So his roommate walked in on us, went upstairs to tell her bf she has found a new use for the rafters & they must try it.
Im like a saiyan, last weekends hangover will only make me stronger
Quick I need a sexy way to say "suck your balls"
So glad I can hide money in my wallet and drunk me is too stupid to find it. Hangover sushi ftw.
I mean metaphorically. Literally zombies have yet to invade. Let's be rational here.
Randomize
