So are you the girl that gave me herpes? or was that the girl from the night before
Some dude at the gas station right now is buying a 30 rack of beast and a can of cat food. Happy Thanksgiving.
i was so drunk i stopped mid-blowjob to make sure he i was with my boyfriend and not some random. twice.
How does one fall all the way up a flight of stairs? Its hard on me knowing that the survival of our species depends on me not reproducing.
She just sucked the buffalo sauce out of my beard. I've never been so disgusted and hard in my life.
and then he started using my ass as a stressball
I got to find out the airplane alcohol limit, and somehow I made it through the flight.
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
I found him passed out against a dryer in the girls washroom, in front of an old woman was trying to figure out how to dry her hands.
It was Thanksgiving sex. I was thankful for it. Need I say more?
After sex he just told me I'm definitely pregnant and it's a girl. Should I run?
I walked out in my coconut bra, and that's when it all went downhill.
It's barely past noon, how am I already talking about double penetration
dude it's 9am and i'm still drunk it's too early for sexting
You're not who I thought you were. You've changed.
my mom tells me this morning that i was blasting teach me how to dougie at 2 am last night and refused to leave her room until she dougied with me
Randomize
