from now on, im only gona ahve sex with my boyfriend.
Sam Adams makes it so easy to keep track of the seasons.
is 1am too late, or too early to make bacon?
I was. I was trying to blow bubbles in the toilet after I threw up in it. They had to carry me everywhere. I lost a sock.
its a long story involving jim bean, an owl, and a knife
I just ran into the married chick you banged 2 years ago at our apt! She asked me if I could get her coke! Memories bro. Memories
Yes stubble LOOKS hot but factor in his shitty bj skills and I might as well have jacked off with apricot scrub
What the fuck could you be doing in that room to make her yell "Beginners Luck!" over and over again?
It's like god made him fantastic at oral to make up for what his mouth does the rest of the time.
Can I color on your dick again?
You had me on my knees catching cheese balls in my mouth and moaning. In front of all your friends.
Yeah I don't think your wife thinks it's a good thing that you're fucking your cousin.
just walked passed a black light...apparently he DID cum.
I opened my eyes to the dog snorting coke, I decided it was best to just close my eyes and forget what I saw
skipped tacos for a blowjob. No tacos. No blowjob. More importantly...no tacos. Wtf?
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