i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
Bring booze and chicks. Separate, or one already in the other. Your call.
So he asked me last night if I would cheer him on while he masturbated...
I'm drinking reisling in a paper cup by myself in the garage.
Dude, totally just found out that I've been washing my hair with semen for the past 3 weeks.
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
You just kept screaming "You are no House!!!" at the ER doc trying to stitch your head
Is it possible to get a DUI in a wheelchair that's not yours?
We would be rich. And the whole world would be stoned.
I wore wrist and ankle weights while we had sex. Does that count as working out?
That Kevin guy is something else...His penis is fucking glorious. And he has a way with words. If he lived here I'd be the conductor of the fuck caboose. I mean literally I would never want to get off that thing.
Dude, I'm not going to use a butt plug.
Well, if you're anything like me you'll get a lot of ass when you turn 30, so that's a plus
drinking vodka out of a wine glass to feel a little bit classier about myself.
On the good side I got hit on by a cute college guy. But the bad side was having sex in a frat house for first time in 9 years
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