stayed up until 6am doing my presentation on buddhist art and the practice of chanting. took shots. did drugs. the powerpoint now includes a sesame street style game (with chicken/puppy clip art), an xzibit music video (and quotes about section eight and eating steaks), and a reference to a german metal band (universe). this is going to be the best presentation ever
I hope as the only other living being in this apartment you can explain to me why the toilet was full of cheerios this morning.
hes totally cute, too bad i slept with his father
CONGRATS VODKA, YOU WON RHIS TIME..
Just because its your birthday does not mean u can play quarters by dropping quarters into cups to make me drink.
It's 9am. I'm four lines ahead of you already. Wake up.
Remember that time i gave you head on MY birthday and you made me stop so you could watch the rhino part in 300
Ah well. Drinking wouldn't be drinking without mystery bruises
Agreed.
I started a USA chant at the bar last night for no reason, other than being plastered. Within 15 seconds, I was standing on a table and the whole bar was chanting but nobody knew why.
YAY! I just removed my own stitches, and I'm only bleeding from one spot! on a related note, do you think a dishwasher will sterilize forceps and trauma shears?
Well, I can now cross "dirty drunk homeless hobo" off of my bucket list of people who have been successful wingmen for me. North Carolina is getting weird.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
Thank you, my gorgeous heroine, for being such a total life-saver by giving me rides, forcing me to eat, providing porous absorbant surfaces to bleed on, and everything else you do <3
You set a couch on fire in my brothers backyard?
Just the cushions
So...I'm pretty sure I have officially determined that reverse cowgirl is the only position possible to have sex in my smart four two
Randomize
