If she sees it and stops hooking up w/ me then you owe me
I have a walk of shame I should be getting to. "Hey, by the way, what is your name?" is not a conversation I want to have today
my phone cant type all the emotion im having
he emptied an entire bag of goldfish onto the bed and rolled around yelling the theme to jaws trying to eat them
People are suprisingly accepting of someone doing a walk of shame in a toga...
there's no food at this bar, but i'm pretty sure vodka is made of wheat so i'm basically drinking bread.
Care to explain why there is sushi in the soap dish in the bathroom
you have failed as an in class drinking partner.
this is not the first time I've had hot dogs and 151 for thanksgiving.
He might have if you were a little more subtle about your feelings instead of telling everyone multiple times how much you wanted his dick
I went around and congratulated every guy that had a beard for having one
Goddamn tequila
i was in burrito mode and too drunk to move. no fucks were given. none.
you texted him "it's time for the no pants dance", please get your tubes tied.
I would pay to watch a Bravo special of you getting Botox.
So I just went to clothing optional bar
Randomize
